This morning I had a rather interesting conversation with my local Police station. Well I say local Police station, it was actually just a local number but the call was routed through to a call centre of some sort which "looks after" the calls for the southern London Borough's apparently.
Anyway, at 6.30 this morning I went out the front of my little terrace house for a quick ciggy - the boy was up at 6.15. We don't smoke in the house because of the kids and the smell it makes, whilst outside I heard some of the most thumping techno I'd heard for... oh about 12 hours. I went to SW4 yesterday you see.
The music this morning was loud and constant and I'm pretty sure it was at least 250 yards or more away from my house. It had a muffled sound to it. At first I thought it was someone in a car but it never got louder or quieter and was just stable in volume.
Purely as an aside it was actually a really good tune, but that is by the by, it's 6.30am on a Sunday in residential area, not exactly neighbourly is it? So, I finshed the ciggy and popped in the house and called the local Bill. The conversation went (approximately) like this:
Me: I live in XXXX Road and somewhere down the road someone is having one hell of a party. I can almost feel the bass from the techno, I imagine the neighbours are not very happy about it.Needless to say when I called the Council there was no answer. So basically, if you live where I live and your neighbours decide to whack up the volume on their 10K sound system and it's the weekend, the Police won't do anything and the Council aren't available.
Police: We have no power to do anything about noise, that's a matter for the local Council.
Me: Errr, surely this is some sort of breach of the peace?
Police: Only if they're having a party in the street. Otherwise it's a noise issue and you have to speak to the local Council, do you want the number?
Me: Are they likely to be there at this time on a Sunday morning?
Police: Every Council is different.
Me: Look, you do realise that if you go to this house it's gonna be full of people off their heads on pills and you'll probably find all sort of drugs there, right?*
Police: You can't make a sweeping generalisation like that.
Me: I can. It's 6.30am on a Sunday morning, do you think they've just woken up and decided to play techno really loudly?
Police: It's really a matter for the Council.
Me: OK, just give me their number and I'll call them.
* It's worth noting that whilst I remain someone who would rather just see drugs legalised and taxed, I was trying to appeal to the "anything for a collar" nature that The Bill has taught me exists in the Police Force. I will of course be writing a letter to ITV to complain about the way they misrepresent the Police to the nation - quite possible in CAPS and green ink.